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Episode 149
Episode 149 is an episode of the Drunken Peasants. Prev: Episode 148 Next: Episode 150 Highlights * Featured Video: Amazing Atheist exposed as a Satanic banana sodomite who works for the Illuminati * The introduction of the Crazy People Segment * The Vigilant Pan Smoker caught with weed. * Gail's yeast infection. * Crazy Craigslist Ads. * Republican candidates sell their bodies to the voting public. * The debut of an intro for the Q&A Segment. Videos Played *Troll or Not a Troll Segment: Atheists are dumb (not found) *Crazy People Segment: VIGILANT CHRISTIAN BUSTED WITH WEED ... !?!?!?!? *Alex Jones: TOTAL EMERGENCY ALERT Update: Global Meltdown Begins *Some British Fuck Defends Jenny McDermott *SUPPORT the POLICE! *Europe and Biological Warfare * Angry, Violent and Racist White Man Threatens Black Protesters *Gail Chord Schuler: JESUS CHRIST treating systemic yeast in Gail Chord *Brother Nathaneal: If I Were President *CNN: Driver to meet cop who stopped him for 'eye contact' *News Segment: Brothers accused in violent attack of parents at Snellville home *CNN: Walter Palmer the lion killer returns (not found) *Ben Carson at CPAC (not found) *Who is Mike Huckabee? (not found) *Who is Rick Santorum? (not found) Start of the Show The episode started out with TJ being exposed as an Illuminati puppet. The Drunken Peasants then announced that the 150th episode will feature Vegan Gains and the Vigilant Christian as guests. While pimping the shirts, TJ mentioned that he no longer hears banana jokes everywhere he goes; he now hears garbage jokes everywhere he goes. He doesn't like this as he never shoved garbage up his ass. They moved into the Troll or Not a Troll segment and played a video of a retarded kid explaining why atheists are dumb. His first reason is that his bible teacher tells him to say it and she's wise. His second reason is that atheists think humans came from monkeys, ironically, this bastard isn't that far from a monkey in terms of evolutionary genealogy. The DP concluded that he was an obvious Troll. They entered the Crazy People Segment where they played a Vigilant Christian video explaining how he was busted for possessing pan. He claimed that he was under the influence of Satan at the time, prompting him to try drugs, fortunately he quit after he found Jesus again. TVC goes on talking about how drugs ruin your relationship with God. Next, Alex Jones talks about how the Tea Party could totally kick the US Army's ass (the most funded military in the world) and that civil unrest is obviously on the rise. TJ suspected that Alex Jones may not believe everything he says and is simply trying to manipulate his retarded audience. Jones brings up the fucking gold standard again even though it's only worth what human society assign it to be (you know, kinda like PAPER FUCKING MONEY.) The peasants nearly committed suicide from the stupidity of Jones but Ben manages to hit the mouse to change videos. Next, some British fuck (likely another one of TJ's Jesuit clones) attempts to defend Jenny McShitTits. TJ interrupts the video by sarcastically going full MGTOW to hate on all women, claiming that a sausage-fest is the only festival for him. TJ clarifies the Jenny McDermott and Armoured Skeptic debacle and says that it makes no sense to defend Jenny by default. TJ mimics the audience and asks Ben to move on. Then, some wanker named Dave talks about why he is upset because Americans are starting to hate the police abusing their power. He claims that this anti-cop mentality has only arisen the past year, even though the police have been fucking up shit since the Civil Rights era in the 1960s and even prior to that. The man in question then discussed how a police officer was denied service at an Arby's restaurant. Next, Atheist Roo's grandfather declares that it would be better to be hit with a nuclear weapon than have diversity. He argues that sure a lot of people died in the bombings of Japan during World War 2, but it would have been WAY worse for the Japanese if we sent a few Mexican or Muslim kids there instead. Ben points out that this guy is a brony. Next, they watched a video from a discount Wild Bill claiming that law enforcement should kill black protesters. He later says that old people should assault Black Panthers with slingshots, no we didn't make this shit up, just watch the episode. Middle Of The Show The peasants then reviewed a Gail Schuler video in which she shows the support for a new radio station run by her men that features her beautiful music. Gail reveals that some members of her church praised Brent Spiner for the radio station, but that he felt all credit should go to her. Even Jesus Christ himself seems to be a huge fan. Apparently Jesus convinced Gail to get off of her crazy pills and brought her to a state of permanent euphoria. Jesus tried to cure Gail's yeast infection. Afterwards, Brother Nathanael talks about a billion ways in which he'll punish the Jews, proving that he would be the perfect president if we ever want a new Hitler. TJ commented that he could be a villain in a Resident Evil video game because he looks evil and scary. Nathanael then calls ALL news networks a tool of the Jewish agenda. They then took a break, this time featuring the original break soundtrack by Berserkyd. They returned from the break and went directly into the Crazy Craigslist Ads. They then read a CNN article about Mike Fuckabee getting in a Twitter fight with Gavin Newsom. The peasants stated that trying to have a serious debate over Twitter is stupid. The actual debate was about that bitch you've all heard of who refused to issue gay marriage licenses, if you're reading this in the future, you probably have no idea who that is because she hopefully had her head guillotined off by then (She's Kim Davis). They then went into the good old news segment. The first news story was about some guy who got pulled over for making "eye contact" with an officer, but it was clearly a case of driving while black. TJ told a story about when he was pulled over for "suspiciously" looking out his own window one day. Next, they watched a news report about two kids who tried to murder their parents. They then watched a CNN report about the old asshole dentist who spent money to kill a majestic lion in cold blood like something out of a sitcom. He wasn't charged with a crime because he was in Africa. TJ concluded that he was a major cunt. Next, they watched a video about Ben Carson's political campaign. TJ commented that he's a popular Republican candidate and could potentially beat Trump in the nomination. The video tries to present Carson saying all his "enlightening" shit but it instead makes him look just as retarded as any other conservative in the country. Carson claims that ObamaCare is the worst thing to happen in the US since slavery. The peasants were amazed that such a gifted neurosurgeon could be so politically dense. End of the Show The peasants reviewed a video listing off random bullshit facts about Mike Huckabee. It showed a bunch of pictures that make him look retarded. They then looked at a video featuring Rick Santorum, in the video he looks like a gangsta. TJ goes on a brief tangent about how Nazis have a great fashion sense. Next, they went into the Q&A segment and answered some questions. Quotes *''"So he's watching... while you Mid-90's Kevin Nash it up..." - TJ quotes one of Ben's jokes. *"He hates curly fries."'' - Ben *''"I got the mic wet. And a lot of pussies out there."'' - TJ *''"Dr. Jesus. Paging Dr. Jesus"'' - Ben during Gail's video. *''"They risk their liiiiiiives"'' - TJ in his redneck voice giving the same excuse for police brutality as any conservative fuck. Trivia *Scotty Cena is a homophobe. *Mario is the leader of a drug cartel, he also loves bitches and cocaine.https://youtu.be/4xF2pSLYZXc?t=20m *TVC once did speed for 1 month straight. *TVC used to be a drug addict, but then he found out the world is run by a shadowy one-Earth government. *TJ hasn't eaten Arby's in 6-7 months but he still loves to eat there. *Zimbabwe is a fucked up country with fucked up laws. *TJ is a fan of Nazi Germany's uniforms because they look cool as fuck. *TJ is a huge fan of Nostalgia Critic and the AVGN. *Upcoming private shows will we the first Saturday of every month. References Disclaimer Offended? -> Disclaimer Page Sagas Category:Drunken Peasants Episodes